Alignment

This week, I want to remind myself of an important concept I often forget. I’m hoping it will help some of you as well.

“How are you?”

The universal question when greeting someone. Expressed in a hundred different ways, each with slightly different wording… yet the question remains the same.

It can be a casual “How’s it going?” with a stranger. It can be an intimate “How are you doing?” with a family member. It can be anywhere in between.

Whichever scenario, I find myself responding the same way: “I’m doing well.”

While the way I say it may change depending on who I’m speaking with, the message is clear: I’m all good. Don’t worry about me. I’m having a good day.

But even when I’m not doing well or having a bad day, my answer is still “I’m doing well.”

As a Christian, one of my core values is honesty… yet when I respond this way, I’m not being honest. I’m being dishonest.

It’s a situation where my knowledge and behavior don’t match up.

To justify myself, I say, “I don’t want to make things awkward and have people worrying about me. It doesn’t make a difference anyway.”

I rationalize my decision to lie so I don’t feel as bad about it.

Sound familiar?

Examples like this are evident in my life: Harboring hate for another while I value love. Acting prideful or arrogant while I value humility. And most severe, neglecting God when the single most important thing in my life is to grow in my relationship with Him.

When beliefs and actions don’t line up, the mind makes one of two decisions:

1. Rationalize the beliefs so they line up with the actions or

2. Rationalize the actions so they line up with the beliefs

Since my Christian values are the backbone of who I am, it’s always the latter. I make up excuses, so my actions don’t seem as bad. I say that this scenario is an exception, or I only did it to benefit others. That way, the gap between what I did and what I believe isn’t nearly so wide.

This shouldn’t be so.

I’m striving to work on this part of my life. I know I won’t be perfect, but there is room for improvement.

If you can relate, you aren’t alone. Let’s work towards unity of belief and action together.

Keep making progress. Change for the better. Live the Heming-way.

Til next time,

Trevor